It was very generous to offer to take the kids. Very immature for the parents of the kids to think they were going along too. What were they going to do at home by themselves….grow up people figure it out. Let the kids spend time with auntie and uncle…appreciate what you have been offered
It’s crazy how entitled and selfish people can be. My kids have gone to Disney various times without me. While there’s always a part of me that wishes I could go, I’m just happy when they’re safe and having a good time. The SIL is definitely out of line for her bratty behavior.
Again the “everyone gets a prize” attitude emerges. Unless they come they deprive the children. Pay for us too or else??? Terrible. Tell them they can come as long as they pay their own way. Sad for the kids and even sadder for the aunts and uncles that are required to be the sugar daddy or be admonished for not doing so.
That’s pretty selfish and entitled. Why would you deny your kids the experience you obviously can’t afford? If planned enough in advance I would try to find a way to pay my way and join them since getting time off from work isn’t the issue. Otherwise I’d plan a couple days off without the kids and do something fun with my significant significant other. Sheesh.
Lol! Though is very nice this couple wants to take their niece and nephew on vacation with them. They shouldn’t have not offered to do this. Next time they should go on a vacation with out family
Lesson learned, be specific with details, up front. I announced I was taking my grandkids on a Disney Cruise. The parents were welcome to book their own cabin-AT THEIR EXPENSE. It ended up being 12 of us. It was fantastic. The three grandkids stayed in our cabin. Everyone else was free to pay their own way, and do as they pleased. My only request was that we all met for dinner each night. It was a blast!!
I’ve setup something similar for next year, my Mother who is now 64 has never been to Disney nor Florida. Our family are AP holders and go multiple times a year so I booked a cruise on the wish, followed by 5 days at WDW and completely paid for my mother’s trip, inviting the rest of the family to join us if they so choose. So far no commitments from any of them, but no complaints either! I didnt offer to pay for my brother or his family .. he makes as much money as I do and I also gave him and his wife a few thousand dollars in Disney gift cards as a wedding gift to use for them to take a trip that he hasn’t used yet.. unless his wife sold them.. lol
Same!
My son and DIL will not let us bring our grandsons individually- we have to take all 3, and them. Their immaturity and jealousy is robbing their own children from spending time with their grandparents and making lifelong memories. Very sad.
How sad! I started with my first grandson, taking each on a solo trip after their 10th birthday – if the parents wanted to come and bring siblings, they paid their own way – it’s been a blast so far – I only have one more trip to go and it will the four youngest, they’re all within a year of each other
Something similar happened to my husband and I when we asked to take out only two grandchildren on a trip to a large city on the west coast that is a renowned vacation destination. I grew up in this city and wanted our grandchildren to see where I grew up, as we had moved away from it several years ago and relocated to the Midwest because we couldn’t afford to live in the large city any more. Our daughter and son in law immediately assumed they were invited as well and that we were going to pay for their flight and hotel rooms. When we told them they would have to pay for their own travel and accomodations, they played the “we aren’t comfortable with you guys taking the grandkids without us” card. They made it clear that if they weren’t going, our grandkids weren’t going either. Long story short, we ended up paying for part of their trip, admission to several expensive attractions, meals, etc. When we look back on memories of that trip, they are tainted with some bitterness because we spent way beyond what we budgeted for that trip, due to covering much of the expenses from daughter and son in law tagging along. We wanted to take the kids to Disneyland on that trip, but son in law announced that he was planning to take his family there on a trip in the future when our grandson would be old enough and big enough to ride more of the rides. (Grandson was 5 at the time, granddaughter was 8) Fast forward almost 8 years later and our son in law has yet to take that trip. Our granddaughter is now almost 16 and grandson is 13. How sad that parent’s selfishness has robbed our grandkids of the joy and excitement of visiting Disneyland when they were little enough to appreciate all the magic.
I cannot believe Parents are taking advantage of offers bestowed on the children!? I would have sent my children in a heartbeat! How selfish, petty and rude!
They should be excited for their children, that you love them that much. She needs to grow up and get over it. Tell her she can go put she has to pay for her own way, You don’t see the other parents act like Ass
While I understand that some people think the parents should be able to go if they pay their own way, sometimes we grandparents just want to be with the grandkids by ourselves. In our family, we can’t stand the lazy useless son-in-law. Sometimes we just want to be with our daughter & grandsons. She insists he must come to everything. Since we all live within an hour of Disney World, we’ve offered to buy annual passes for the grandsons. Our own daughter refuses to let us take them at all without her. The boys are now 8 and I know their parents will never be able to afford to do anything like Disney ever. At this point my husband doesn’t even want to do anything with them as they never offer to pay for anything. Now they even want gas $ to come visit. It’s so sad.
Gonna be real, I just don’t believe you. I see too much of this “I hate my SIL, because he’s lazy!” And actually the person is disabled, or works a job but not one that’s “good enough” and so on.
I get you want to spend 1 on 1 time with your daughter, but if you’re openly disparaging her spouse, you can’t act surprised. And seeing as she doesn’t let you get away with trying to shove him out, she clearly doesn’t agree with you, and would rather put up a “United front” against y’all.
You can either suck it up, and possibly have your daughter be more open to spending time with you, even if he’s there. Or you can allow your petty hatred of your daughter’s husband to push them both away. In the end, you’ll only have yourself to blame, regardless of what you choose.
I had my ex in-laws offer to take my oldest when she was 5. As a parent I refused the offer. For one they didn’t show maturity to take care of my daughter (mother in law never had kids, and father in law didn’t raise my ex his grandma did). Two I stated she could go if we could too. I would pay my own way, but I never went to Disney and no way in hell was I ever going to let my kid go and not be able to see her face when she saw the castle in person. Their response was you can’t go even if you pay your own way, and you’ll never be able to take her on your own. Fast forward 11 years two divorces (theirs and ours) later, and I’m not only taking one kid, but two on my own as a single mother. Nobody knows yet, but it’s going to be the kids’ Christmas present this year.
How ridiculous! First of all, they literally can’t say you can’t go. Yes, they could be rude and make you feel unwelcome the entire time, but have no actual way of preventing you. Secondly, I wouldn’t let my almost 7 year old go with my in laws because they’re not very attentive. I need to make sure he’s watched well because he’s super impulsive. And at that age I love enjoying experiences with him. But there’s nothing wrong with setting boundaries for how and when time is spent alone with your child.
Kinda what I thought, but they made it clear that we weren’t welcome. And, if we were going they weren’t taking her. I’m proving them wrong and taking both kids on my own now.
Grandma offered to take each of the grands to WDW when they turned 5. Each had a blast. While their siblings were disappointed they couldn’t go, they got “bragging rights” when it was their turn. The kids parents were allowed to go, per grandma, if they paid their own way and got their own room. Our trip was awesome. We got to see our kids having a blast, while grandma did all the work.
This SIL should be grateful her kids are getting the opportunity of a lifetime….for them anyway.
First thing being well off is not always about money. Maybe the family with children is actually the family that is more “well off”.
2nd stop offering things to their children that is above their means, Maybe those children won’t be able to provide that to their own family later in life. If you want to have children in your life to stop feeling selfish, have your own. Maybe then you will know the true meaning of ” well off.”
You must be miserable and poor, lol. What they’re offering is more than what their parents will ever be able to do for them. The kids deserve to go. I can guarantee you never went. You just want those poor kids to be miserable because are. Yeah, you’re one of those people, lol. Shame on you
So, my grandparents took me when I was 9 to WDW back in 1976, w/o my parents. My parents had taken me before, so they’d already been. So no biggie from that aspect.
I sooo remember the E ticket rides,, they were always the best rides [ask an old person about the Disney ride tickets]
We drove put from Baltimore one morning during the summer, headed down to Orlando. We always drove. This was before airline deregulation, and airline price wars, making it affordable to fly. Stopping at all the cheesy
I-95 roadside attractions that existed back then, such as Pedro’s SOTB
This was WAY pre … Yo Quiero Taco Bell days
My brother had just been born and my GP thought it good I go with them, giving my parents a break, and to be able to focus just on the screaming poop machine that was my brother.
I’d never been separated from my parents for a whole week before. So that was different, and caused a bit of homesickness.
There was only one problem caused by my parents. Well, caused by my mother. As I said they had taken me a few times before, we went pretty much ever since WDW opened in 1971.
So, here we are, my GP and I having fun at The Magic Kingdom. That’s all there was at that time The Magic Kingdom. Epcot was still a glimmer. No Hollywood Studios, or Animal Kingdom. ONLY the MK
This is when what my mother told me just before we left, came flooding back.
What she said is … “Think of me when you get on
It’s A Small World, it’s my favorite ride”
Well, that did it. As we were getting into line for It’s A Small World I (LMS”) Lost My …. bawling my eyes out. The homesickness overrode any of the fun of woo-hoo we’re at WDW.
I couldn’t get on the ride. We had to wait until the next day, after we got back to the hotel room, and called my mother LONG DISTANCE … ON A HOTEL PHONE … which cost a fortune back then. That call could have paid for another day at Disney for us. [Only slight exaggeration]
Even then, after she talked me off the ledge. I still started crying when I was on the ride and hearing the song “It’s A Small World”
Twenty years of therapy for that one. Thanks mom.
So … to get to the kerfuffle at hand. No you’re NOT “AITA”
The offer was a reasonable one. Their reaction, was not. A solution to the issue, unless you really don’t want to be around them. Is that, fine they can go to WDW you will pay for your Nieces, but they have to pay for themselves. If they can’t afford it, and still deny their children the opportunity.
Then they are selfish parents, and I feel sorry for their children. Who, incidentally, are being taught, that, their parents prioritize themselves, over their children. It’s not your responsibility to pay for their mistakes. It’s great that you are willing to make sure their kids don’t miss out on experiences, because of their mistakes.
I’ll take a guess, that you’ve probably assisted them in other ways in the past. So the expectation is there, that you should go above and beyond your original offer may be result of that.
Continue to be generous with your time, and ability to improve the lives of the rest of your non-narcissistic extended family. Kudos
Ridiculous. If I offer to take someone’s kids somewhere, and wanted the parents to go with me, I would explicitly tell them. Very selfish of the parents to think they have the right to include themselves. And even more selfish to say their kids can’t go If they don’t go. I would be saying ‘explain to your kids why they cannot go now and I’d say see ya when we get back’. ✌️..I’m a Disney person and go every year. If ppl want to come along, they are welcome to, but they pay their own way.
My family and I went to Walt Disney World on July 15th and 16th,took our chances of course but we all came down with COVID. So I highly recommend wearing a mask. Wish we would have
Comments for Family In Turmoil After Walt Disney World Vacation Drama
Martha
It was very generous to offer to take the kids. Very immature for the parents of the kids to think they were going along too. What were they going to do at home by themselves….grow up people figure it out. Let the kids spend time with auntie and uncle…appreciate what you have been offered
Brandi
It’s crazy how entitled and selfish people can be. My kids have gone to Disney various times without me. While there’s always a part of me that wishes I could go, I’m just happy when they’re safe and having a good time. The SIL is definitely out of line for her bratty behavior.
Gloria Graham Petrone
Again the “everyone gets a prize” attitude emerges. Unless they come they deprive the children. Pay for us too or else??? Terrible. Tell them they can come as long as they pay their own way. Sad for the kids and even sadder for the aunts and uncles that are required to be the sugar daddy or be admonished for not doing so.
Liz
You’d be shocked. A lot of parents do this.
Mcm
That’s pretty selfish and entitled. Why would you deny your kids the experience you obviously can’t afford? If planned enough in advance I would try to find a way to pay my way and join them since getting time off from work isn’t the issue. Otherwise I’d plan a couple days off without the kids and do something fun with my significant significant other. Sheesh.
Christine
It would be more than fair if the parents paid their own way while the kids were treated
Chris Wood
Lol! Though is very nice this couple wants to take their niece and nephew on vacation with them. They shouldn’t have not offered to do this. Next time they should go on a vacation with out family
Marsha
Lesson learned, be specific with details, up front. I announced I was taking my grandkids on a Disney Cruise. The parents were welcome to book their own cabin-AT THEIR EXPENSE. It ended up being 12 of us. It was fantastic. The three grandkids stayed in our cabin. Everyone else was free to pay their own way, and do as they pleased. My only request was that we all met for dinner each night. It was a blast!!
Scott
I’ve setup something similar for next year, my Mother who is now 64 has never been to Disney nor Florida. Our family are AP holders and go multiple times a year so I booked a cruise on the wish, followed by 5 days at WDW and completely paid for my mother’s trip, inviting the rest of the family to join us if they so choose. So far no commitments from any of them, but no complaints either! I didnt offer to pay for my brother or his family .. he makes as much money as I do and I also gave him and his wife a few thousand dollars in Disney gift cards as a wedding gift to use for them to take a trip that he hasn’t used yet.. unless his wife sold them.. lol
Lady Leela
That IS How You do It: adults pay for themselves, of course! 👍🏻
Angie
Same!
My son and DIL will not let us bring our grandsons individually- we have to take all 3, and them. Their immaturity and jealousy is robbing their own children from spending time with their grandparents and making lifelong memories. Very sad.
Chris W
How sad! I started with my first grandson, taking each on a solo trip after their 10th birthday – if the parents wanted to come and bring siblings, they paid their own way – it’s been a blast so far – I only have one more trip to go and it will the four youngest, they’re all within a year of each other
See
Something similar happened to my husband and I when we asked to take out only two grandchildren on a trip to a large city on the west coast that is a renowned vacation destination. I grew up in this city and wanted our grandchildren to see where I grew up, as we had moved away from it several years ago and relocated to the Midwest because we couldn’t afford to live in the large city any more. Our daughter and son in law immediately assumed they were invited as well and that we were going to pay for their flight and hotel rooms. When we told them they would have to pay for their own travel and accomodations, they played the “we aren’t comfortable with you guys taking the grandkids without us” card. They made it clear that if they weren’t going, our grandkids weren’t going either. Long story short, we ended up paying for part of their trip, admission to several expensive attractions, meals, etc. When we look back on memories of that trip, they are tainted with some bitterness because we spent way beyond what we budgeted for that trip, due to covering much of the expenses from daughter and son in law tagging along. We wanted to take the kids to Disneyland on that trip, but son in law announced that he was planning to take his family there on a trip in the future when our grandson would be old enough and big enough to ride more of the rides. (Grandson was 5 at the time, granddaughter was 8) Fast forward almost 8 years later and our son in law has yet to take that trip. Our granddaughter is now almost 16 and grandson is 13. How sad that parent’s selfishness has robbed our grandkids of the joy and excitement of visiting Disneyland when they were little enough to appreciate all the magic.
Mary Ellen
I cannot believe Parents are taking advantage of offers bestowed on the children!? I would have sent my children in a heartbeat! How selfish, petty and rude!
Linda
They should be excited for their children, that you love them that much. She needs to grow up and get over it. Tell her she can go put she has to pay for her own way, You don’t see the other parents act like Ass
Cindi Galaxy
While I understand that some people think the parents should be able to go if they pay their own way, sometimes we grandparents just want to be with the grandkids by ourselves. In our family, we can’t stand the lazy useless son-in-law. Sometimes we just want to be with our daughter & grandsons. She insists he must come to everything. Since we all live within an hour of Disney World, we’ve offered to buy annual passes for the grandsons. Our own daughter refuses to let us take them at all without her. The boys are now 8 and I know their parents will never be able to afford to do anything like Disney ever. At this point my husband doesn’t even want to do anything with them as they never offer to pay for anything. Now they even want gas $ to come visit. It’s so sad.
JNMIL
Gonna be real, I just don’t believe you. I see too much of this “I hate my SIL, because he’s lazy!” And actually the person is disabled, or works a job but not one that’s “good enough” and so on.
I get you want to spend 1 on 1 time with your daughter, but if you’re openly disparaging her spouse, you can’t act surprised. And seeing as she doesn’t let you get away with trying to shove him out, she clearly doesn’t agree with you, and would rather put up a “United front” against y’all.
You can either suck it up, and possibly have your daughter be more open to spending time with you, even if he’s there. Or you can allow your petty hatred of your daughter’s husband to push them both away. In the end, you’ll only have yourself to blame, regardless of what you choose.
DAD
I had my ex in-laws offer to take my oldest when she was 5. As a parent I refused the offer. For one they didn’t show maturity to take care of my daughter (mother in law never had kids, and father in law didn’t raise my ex his grandma did). Two I stated she could go if we could too. I would pay my own way, but I never went to Disney and no way in hell was I ever going to let my kid go and not be able to see her face when she saw the castle in person. Their response was you can’t go even if you pay your own way, and you’ll never be able to take her on your own. Fast forward 11 years two divorces (theirs and ours) later, and I’m not only taking one kid, but two on my own as a single mother. Nobody knows yet, but it’s going to be the kids’ Christmas present this year.
Brandi
How ridiculous! First of all, they literally can’t say you can’t go. Yes, they could be rude and make you feel unwelcome the entire time, but have no actual way of preventing you. Secondly, I wouldn’t let my almost 7 year old go with my in laws because they’re not very attentive. I need to make sure he’s watched well because he’s super impulsive. And at that age I love enjoying experiences with him. But there’s nothing wrong with setting boundaries for how and when time is spent alone with your child.
DAD
Kinda what I thought, but they made it clear that we weren’t welcome. And, if we were going they weren’t taking her. I’m proving them wrong and taking both kids on my own now.
DJT Luvsputin
If they want to go they should chip in atleast their airfare. Attempt to pay for something for their part.
Gm
DPH I had to laugh at your comment since you just took up unwanted space complaining about this article taking up space LOL!
Paul Bishop
Lmao
Mickeymouse3
Grandma offered to take each of the grands to WDW when they turned 5. Each had a blast. While their siblings were disappointed they couldn’t go, they got “bragging rights” when it was their turn. The kids parents were allowed to go, per grandma, if they paid their own way and got their own room. Our trip was awesome. We got to see our kids having a blast, while grandma did all the work.
This SIL should be grateful her kids are getting the opportunity of a lifetime….for them anyway.
Mike
First thing being well off is not always about money. Maybe the family with children is actually the family that is more “well off”.
2nd stop offering things to their children that is above their means, Maybe those children won’t be able to provide that to their own family later in life. If you want to have children in your life to stop feeling selfish, have your own. Maybe then you will know the true meaning of ” well off.”
Drobinson1055
You must be miserable and poor, lol. What they’re offering is more than what their parents will ever be able to do for them. The kids deserve to go. I can guarantee you never went. You just want those poor kids to be miserable because are. Yeah, you’re one of those people, lol. Shame on you
R Kip
So, my grandparents took me when I was 9 to WDW back in 1976, w/o my parents. My parents had taken me before, so they’d already been. So no biggie from that aspect.
I sooo remember the E ticket rides,, they were always the best rides [ask an old person about the Disney ride tickets]
We drove put from Baltimore one morning during the summer, headed down to Orlando. We always drove. This was before airline deregulation, and airline price wars, making it affordable to fly. Stopping at all the cheesy
I-95 roadside attractions that existed back then, such as Pedro’s SOTB
This was WAY pre … Yo Quiero Taco Bell days
My brother had just been born and my GP thought it good I go with them, giving my parents a break, and to be able to focus just on the screaming poop machine that was my brother.
I’d never been separated from my parents for a whole week before. So that was different, and caused a bit of homesickness.
There was only one problem caused by my parents. Well, caused by my mother. As I said they had taken me a few times before, we went pretty much ever since WDW opened in 1971.
So, here we are, my GP and I having fun at The Magic Kingdom. That’s all there was at that time The Magic Kingdom. Epcot was still a glimmer. No Hollywood Studios, or Animal Kingdom. ONLY the MK
This is when what my mother told me just before we left, came flooding back.
What she said is … “Think of me when you get on
It’s A Small World, it’s my favorite ride”
Well, that did it. As we were getting into line for It’s A Small World I (LMS”) Lost My …. bawling my eyes out. The homesickness overrode any of the fun of woo-hoo we’re at WDW.
I couldn’t get on the ride. We had to wait until the next day, after we got back to the hotel room, and called my mother LONG DISTANCE … ON A HOTEL PHONE … which cost a fortune back then. That call could have paid for another day at Disney for us. [Only slight exaggeration]
Even then, after she talked me off the ledge. I still started crying when I was on the ride and hearing the song “It’s A Small World”
Twenty years of therapy for that one. Thanks mom.
So … to get to the kerfuffle at hand. No you’re NOT “AITA”
The offer was a reasonable one. Their reaction, was not. A solution to the issue, unless you really don’t want to be around them. Is that, fine they can go to WDW you will pay for your Nieces, but they have to pay for themselves. If they can’t afford it, and still deny their children the opportunity.
Then they are selfish parents, and I feel sorry for their children. Who, incidentally, are being taught, that, their parents prioritize themselves, over their children. It’s not your responsibility to pay for their mistakes. It’s great that you are willing to make sure their kids don’t miss out on experiences, because of their mistakes.
I’ll take a guess, that you’ve probably assisted them in other ways in the past. So the expectation is there, that you should go above and beyond your original offer may be result of that.
Continue to be generous with your time, and ability to improve the lives of the rest of your non-narcissistic extended family. Kudos
Hsyb
I feel like if you’re going to try to use the Latin “sic,” you should at least use the correct syntax.
Sonia
Ridiculous. If I offer to take someone’s kids somewhere, and wanted the parents to go with me, I would explicitly tell them. Very selfish of the parents to think they have the right to include themselves. And even more selfish to say their kids can’t go If they don’t go. I would be saying ‘explain to your kids why they cannot go now and I’d say see ya when we get back’. ✌️..I’m a Disney person and go every year. If ppl want to come along, they are welcome to, but they pay their own way.
Kelly
My family and I went to Walt Disney World on July 15th and 16th,took our chances of course but we all came down with COVID. So I highly recommend wearing a mask. Wish we would have
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